Daring to Be » 2005 » April

I’m bad at updating, but you’re all worse at leaving comments. No incentive then, don’t you see? Get back at ‘er.

I’m fairly exhausted. Went out last night, and I was supposed to take it easy because I’m going out tonight. Oops. D and I went to The Cave and had a drink while waiting for Roseanne to get off work. Once she did, we moved over to the lounge and shared a bottle of wine and some appetizers. D’s friend called from Athena’s, so picked up Julie and went over there. Had some more drinks, didn’t get to bed until probably 3:30 or 4 AM! Somebody is a bed hog and therefore I didn’t sleep well.

Today has been hectic as well. Went to Anthony Michael’s Salon and Spa so Selena could do my hair. Highlights, for summer. Then went shopping to Winner’s, there was a pair of Seven jeans for only $50! Unfortunately, they didn’t fit. Darn. I wanted to say I owned Sevens. I guess it’s okay, I should be saving my money for Quebec anyway. Two more weeks!

This is all over the place. It’s because I’m dead tired. I think it’s time for a nice long snooze.

Movie star sunglasses.
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I’m smack dab in the middle of finals right now, so I’ve decided to hide my red and bloodshot eyes behind some huge sunglasses. That way, people can think I’m effortlessly cool in my movie star sunglasses, whereas we all know that in reality, I’m just a big dork who didn’t get enough sleep.

Well, Mike tells me that it’s about time I updated, so here I am. I really don’t have much interesting to say. I always think of really interesting topics to write about when I’m away from a computer. Then, when I have access to a computer, do you think I can think of anything to write? Of course not.

Dad came to Regina yesterday and helped me move a bunch of stuff. Unfortunately, school has been busy so I hadn’t had a chance to pack before he got there. So we basically threw stuff into boxes, and as a result my apartment looks like a tornado went through it. I still have a good two loads of stuff to move. It’s not until I started packing that I realized “Wow do I own alot!”

Oh, I have sad news to report… Rudolph committed suicide. Although I think his death could be classified under assisted suicide. You see, he had been eating those poisonous pellets which apparently make mice thirsty. So he decided to go for a drink in my toilet. And drowned. I’m glad Dad was the one who found him, I would’ve lost it. Hopefully that’s the last mouse I have to deal with for a long, long time.

Onto other big news, I have a date tonight! I’m excited. Date tonight, and then there’s still three other guys who want to take me on dates as well. I’m not expecting to fall in love, get married, and have babies with any of these guys, I’m just excited to actually be going on dates!

It’s freezing in Mom’s basement, so I’ll cut it off here. I promise, next time I actually have an idea of something fun to report to y’all, I’ll write it down.

I am very tired right now. I had Brownies tonight, and it was our spring cookie drive. Us leaders were going to stay back at the school and clean the storage room while the girls went selling cookies with parents, but then I ended up going door-to-door with a couple of the girls. Unfortunately, I was wearing flipflops because I thought I’d be inside all night. It wasn’t horribly cold out, but cold enough that flipflops were not a good idea. My poor feet! Cookie drive came at perfect time, I got to keep some empty boxes for packing. Good, because I really need boxes.

Tomorrow is the last day of school before finals! I’m so thankful… now if only finals were done already. Soon enough I guess. Oh, I get icecream for having perfect attendance in my Social psychology class! I’m such a dork.

Tam is going to call me to go to the gym when her staff meeting is done. I’m so not going. I can’t believe how tired I am. Just from selling cookies door-to-door? Wow, that’s sad.

Well, I’m back in Regina. I’m not very happy about it because guess what? Another mouse. This time it was on my kitchen counter. My own fault though, because I neglected to take out a pizza box with a crust inside to the trash before I left on Friday. That’s like an open invitation to the mouse, like “Hey come inhabit this apartment! Nobody is here and there’s FOOD!”

I’m trying really hard to listen to everyone’s advice. You know “the mouse is more afraid of you than you are of it” type of advice. It’s not working. My landlord wasn’t home last night either, so I have no trap set out. Just the poisonous pellets. After having a really good cry I decided that I’ve got to get over my fear of mice. Like the girl in The Little Princess, I will befriend the mouse. I always wanted a pet right? Now I have one. His name is Rudolph. When he runs by, instead of freaking out and hopping on a chair, now I can say “Hey there Rudolph! How ya doing today?” Nevermind the fact I’ve left poison out to kill my pet.

I’m still afraid though. I tucked my bedskirt under my mattress out of fear Rudolph can climb it and crawl across me during the night. I had a crappy sleep, filled with nightmares about mice. I’ll get over it because like everyone says, the poor thing is more scared of me. So now, before I enter a room, I turn on the light and make some noise. Gives him time to scram before I get in there.

Yes, I’m sure none of you like reading about my frightening rodent experiences. It’s kind of consuming my thoughts right now. Plus, nothing else is really new. Finals start a week from today, and I’m moving my computer to Saskatoon this weekend. I’m guessing my entries will be fairly sporadic for awhile. Hopefully something fun and exciting (not frightening and horrible like these mice stories) happens to me soon, and I can write better entries.

You know what I really hate? I mean really and I mean hate. Mice. UGH.

I never really knew I hated mice until about an hour ago when I saw one run out from behind my computer desk, turn around, and run back behind it. My reaction? Just like in the movies. Meaning: I FREAKED OUT! I screamed and was standing on my chair so fast I think I must’ve broken a record. After hyperventilating for a little while, I coaxed myself off of my computer chair and got a glue trap plus poisonous pellets from my landlord. It took another little while until I had the courage to put both behind my desk.

I also called my Mom and had a good cry about it. Because I am such a girl.

Now I’m curled up on my computer chair so my feet aren’t touching the ground. It’s not very comfortable but I’ve got major heebie jeebies. Just awhile ago I saw something move from the corner of my eye and I must’ve jumped two feet into the air. Turns out it was just my hair falling into my eyes!

I always took pride in the fact that spiders don’t freak me out like they do most girls. In fact I laughed at girls who were afraid of spiders and I said things like “It’s just a spider!” Well, I’m not so brave anymore am I? Nope. Mind you, a mouse is much bigger and much hairier than a spider. And it has CLAWS and TEETH and I’d better stop because I am FREAKING OUT AGAIN.

I am very happy that I’m heading to Carrot River tomorrow to visit my Dad. That means only one night of sleep in this mouse infested apartment. Hopefully while I’m gone the mouse eats the poisonous pellets and crawls someplace I can’t see and dies a peaceful death. I’d prefer that over the glue trap…

AHHH! I just saw it run by again!

…

Okay. Whew. I’m good. It’s now 10:55 PM and I started this entry at 10:18 PM! When the mouse ran by it got stuck in the glue trap. It was alive and wriggling and I was FREAKING OUT. I called my Mom again because I’m a big baby. Of course she can’t really do much, being in Saskatoon and awful icky mouse being with me in Regina. So I went back to my landlords apartment and he was nice enough to come and get rid of it. Yup, it’s official, best landlord ever! I think he deserves a thank-you card.

I’ll be able to sleep tonight! Providing there was only one mouse… I shudder thinking about the possibility of there being more. If there is, the pellets are still out. That’ll take care of them.

It’s funny, about five minutes before the mouse first appeared I was talking to a friend about how sad I was to be moving out of my apartment and how I was going to miss living alone. Now? Not so much. Mice FREAK ME OUT. Ugh.

(End note: I hope y’all understand the gravity of my fear towards mice. I think I used the term “freaking out” enough for it to be crystal clear.)

I am sick of having to read books out of obligation and not out of my own free will.
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I don’t know exactly why I am updating, especially since I have an 8-10 page term paper due in English tomorrow, along with having to study for a Biology lab exam that also takes place tomorrow. Instead I am here, with nothing much to say, writing just because I seem to like updating every second day or so. Also because I am the queen of procrastination.

It is such a beautiful day today. Not a day one wants to spend inside pretending to do homework. I wish I had a laptop. Then I could be sitting on a blanket beside Wascana Lake, typing merrily away. Yes, I could be old-fashioned and write with a pen and paper, but I prefer typing. Much faster. Back in high school, my Papa used to tell me it sounded like a machine gun firing whenever I typed. I’m speedy, oh yes.

Wow, two paragraphs about nothing at all. I wish I had something fun and exciting to write about. Then I could get some lovin’. Comment lovin’ that is. If I were to make a list of things I love, comments would be in the top 10. I kid you not. So if that’s not a big enough hint for y’all to leave comments, then I give up. I’ll never write again and then what’ll you do!? You’ll suffer Brea withdrawal I’m sure. Now I’m just getting arrogant!

The title of this post is from Amos Lee’s “Keep it Loose, Keep it Tight”. Very good song. I highly recommend it. I really like that line, because it is so true. Sometimes I forget. Luckily, I forget less and less as I get older and become increasingly more comfortable in my own skin. Whoever said that high school are the best years of your life ought to be shot. My life just keeps getting better, thanks. I feel sorry for those who believe that, what is there left to look forward to then?

Alright. That’s it. I’m coming up with zero interesting things to write about. I’ll just leave it as is. I apologize for the dreadfully boring entry.

I want to shoot the whole day down.

I’ve decided that in order to overcome my amazing hatred towards Mondays, every Monday morning I shall sing “I Hate Mondays” at the top of my lungs while dancing around in my underwear. It’ll become a quirky little ritual I’ll only do on Mondays and the incredible silliness about it will make the day bearable. Wouldn’t that be nice!

I know everyone wants to hear about how my weekend went. For starters, Tam and I weren’t able to settle on one wine. We started with the Merlot, but it wasn’t long until we were in the white wine and then last but not least the White Zinfandel. Somewhere between the white wine and White Zinfandel, my date arrived. Naturally I was quite fuzzy by that point, so meeting went off without a hitch! Oh, how I love thee liquid courage. No, I am not an alcoholic nor do I need alcohol to have fun. However, in this odd situation, it definitely helped. I’m not being impulsive about anything. Yes, I know that often I lament about single life and how much it can suck. But the pros definitely outweigh the cons and I spend more time happy in my single state than I do crying about it. I don’t want to give it up for just anyone, and meeting someone once doesn’t really tell me whether or not I should give it up. At least, I don’t think so. Or maybe I haven’t changed much from the “love ‘em and leave ‘em” Brea I was in high school.

Baby I want scary kisses
I want hits and I want misses
I want hell and I want bliss - and all that soars between it
And if you give me safety in a short time I’ll be driven crazy
I would rather run and fall, than take no chance at allNothing sums up how I feel better than “Scary Kisses” by Voice of the Beehive. Further in the song it says “I would rather sit here by myself than settle down with someone safe and sound.” Sometimes I wonder if that’s how I am… like that cheesy country song I can’t help but love that goes “I don’t want a man I can live with, I want a man that I can’t live without.”

I am starting to think that perhaps I have some issues regarding relationships, but not only can I not pinpoint what they are but I also have no idea what to do to fix them.

Choices, choices.
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I’m getting nervous about meeting my date! Tam will be coming over later, we’ll be opening up one of those bottles of wine so hopefully I’ll be nice and fuzzy by the time he gets here. Not drunk, just at ease. I think having her here for a bit will definitely help as well.

I am such a girl. Or I just have a big heart. I cried while watching Global National, it was a special edition about the Pope. Well. Crying over that is okay.

This is my third entry today. I must go!