Daring to Be » 2006 » March

Appetizer
Name 3 things that you think are strange.

1. Men. Men are strange.
2. The fact that Nicole and Chad are madly in love after meeting through me and my exboyfriend. Strange, but awesome. I’m okay with getting my heart broken if it meant my sister found love and happiness.
3. Myself, and the way I still sometimes feel like I’m 12 and haven’t got a clue about life.

Soup
What was the last ceremony you attended?

My Uncle Kent’s New Year’s Eve wedding.

Salad
What is one lesson you have learned in the past year?

Listen to your gut instinct, and you’ll never go wrong!

Main Course
Tell us about one of your childhood memories.

ONE? I had such an amazing childhood, this will be tough… this is the first memory that came to mind. I remember playing “Bear” with my Dad. We’d turn off all the lights in the house, then us three kids would go hide. Dad would walk around on all fours and act like a bear, saying he wanted something to eat. Once he found one of us, he’d tickle us and smother us with kisses while we shrieked with laughter. It was so much fun! I love my Dad.

Dessert
If you could extend any of the four seasons to be twice as long as normal, which season would you want to lengthen?

Summer hands down! They are way too short! I’m a total summer girl, and to me it never gets too hot.

Tomorrow is the dreaded, yet highly anticipated, day… wish me luck.

Taken from Christie.

So here’s what I did: iTunes (Windows Media Player for me) on shuffle, say the question, skip to the next song, interpret. So much fun.

How does the world see me?
“The Blower’s Daughter” Damien Rice - Apparently y’all can’t take your eyes off of me! Sweet, I’m flattered.

Will I have a happy life?
“Happy With Myself” Over The Rhine - I’ll try really hard to be happy, and then one day it will eventually happen, and I’ll be happy with myself.

What do my friends really think of me?:
“My Funny Valentine” by Chuck Brown - “Your looks are laughable.” Gee, thanks guys. The whole gyst of the song, though, is that I may not be perfect but I’m loved anyway! I’m down with that.

Do people secretly lust after me?:
“Littlest Bird” The Be Good Tanyas - Lust? No. Love? Yes: “Well I love you so dearly, I love you so clearly.”

How can I make myself happy?
“Striptease” Hawksly Workman - Ahaha! Seriously! Striptease! I’ll get right on that.

What should I do with my life?
“Rock ‘N Roll” The Sounds - Give my heart to rock and roll! Done!

Will I ever have children?
“All is Full of Love” Bjork - I must, since parenthood is often described as being filled with love.

What is some good advice for me?
“A Message” Coldplay - Honestly? This song makes it seem like I have to open my eyes to he whom loves me. Chris Martin, baby, I thought you were taken?

How will I be remembered?
“Happy” Mazzy Star - I’ll be remembered as happy and shining. I like that!

What is my signature dancing song?
“Feel It” by Black Eyed Peas - “I can feel it in my body.” Makes sense. I love dancing.

What do I think my current theme song is?
“Boom Boom Ba” by Metisse - I interpret the lyrics of this song to mean that, even though I have been hurt, I still believe in love. Which is true.

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
“Hindsight” by Death Cab For Cutie - I should have hindsight and fully leave three wasted years behind. Which can only apply to my relationship with R. It’s time to let go.

What song will play at your funeral?
“Goodnight, Hollywood Blvd” by Ryan Adams - Does this mean I’ll be famous someday? And then die of loneliness? Who knows.

What type of men/women do you like?
“Let Me Be The One” by Sasha - I’m easy to please; I like the ones happy with just me!

What is my day going to be like?
“Don’t Deconstruct” by Rilo Kiley - Stressful I guess!

What is the first impression you give off?
“Wayfaring Stranger” by Eva Cassidy - Heh. My first impression on someone? I come off as a stranger? Imagine that.

I think the answers, and my interpretations, worked out quite well.

Into the library, that is.

Right now I am sitting at a computer in Learning Commons, surrounded by so much stuff it seriously looks like I’m planning to stay here awhile. Which I am. Must get this essay finished. Due tomorrow. I’m almost done, but as you can see by the fact I am updating, I like wasting time.

Ever wonder if you have a crush on someone because you are actually interested, or because they are unavailable and thus a “safe” choice?

I wonder.

I have the line “you’ve gone and made me want someone I could never have” from “I’m Shooting Cupid” running through my head…

I don’t like school crushes. Takes away my concentration, and it is nearly impossible to insert “Hey I find you dead sexy and would love to have your babies” into idle classroom chit chat. Or maybe that’s something I need to work on?

Heh.

Last week, at City and Colour, Andrea was telling us about a gay friend of hers who wears a teeshirt that says “Don’t Assume I’m Straight”. Great idea! Maybe I need one that says “Don’t Assume I’m Taken”. Granted, that would only work if males do indeed look at me and say “There’s no way she’s single!” like I tell myself they do!

Well, as much as I’d love it to, this essay really won’t write itself. Really, though, it’s a good thing I’ve updated. One less thing to tempt me away later.

Classic example of a boy not showing interest very well

Sitting in night class Wednesday night when I get a text from Cute Boy, wanting to know what I was up to. I was busy, City and Colour with Wes after class. I ask what he’s up to Friday night, he is busy. I suggest getting together sometime, not sure when though since it’s a bad time of year schoolwise. Then he asks me if I’m busy Friday, I say that I work until 9 PM but otherwise, no, but isn’t he busy? Yes, but maybe I could go with.

Thursday night, talk to him, still doesn’t know about the next night, but will let me know.

Friday night, he texts me asking what I’m doing, I respond I am at work.

Do not hear from him again.

Apparently not going to party, huh?

Next morning get to work and talk to Tam, who was at party, and she says that Cute Boy brought a date. Not a huge deal, I’m dating three guys. This is what pisses me off; as saying goodbye to Tam he says “For the record… I invited Brea first.”

Um.

What?

Yes he invited me but he totally did not follow through in letting me know what the hell was going on.

Not cool. Haven’t talked to him since, do not particularly care if I do either!

Classic example of a boy showing interest very well

At work Saturday and talk to 20 year old.

Him: “Whatcha doing Sunday?”
Me: “Writing term paper.”
Him: “What about Monday?”
Me: “Term paper.”
Him: “… Tuesday?”

Cute. Then when I mentioned I couldn’t wait until I wrote my last final April 22nd, which is basically a month from now, he was all “Well, we’ll go celebrate!”

Plans almost a month in advance? This dude is interested.

Then he came to Rosey’s party last night.

Which I sort of regret, because now everyone thinks I am actually serious about it. Nope. Nice guy, like hanging out, but I really do not want to date anyone exclusively right now.

Not for any particular reason… I guess it’s more like I haven’t met anyone who turns my crank enough to pursue something that even resembles being serious.

He’s out there somewhere.

I hope.

PS: I really do not feel like updating much lately, you may have noticed. I’ll work on it.

What a gong show of a weekend.

I am going to ignore the essay I have to write and the French quiz I have to study for in favour of some much needed sleep.

Entry later, I promise.

Appetizer
How would you describe your personal comfort zone?

I’m a hands-on person. Touchy feely. I’m always grabbing people’s arm when I talk to them. At the same time, I like my space. I hate when strangers touch me. If we’re talking and I grab onto you, be rest assured I count you as a friend and quite like you. I can’t stand virtual hugs from strangers. Some of my Cupid boys, after talking to them, will say goodbye and throw a big *HUGZ* in. That annoys the piss out of me. For one, who spells it “hugz” anyway? Are you twelve? Also, I would not hug you in real life, why is there a need to throw a gay virtual hug in there? So I guess best bet is to let me make the first move in touching you, for to sum it up I don’t like it when people get too close without my permission!

Soup
What is your favorite tree?

I don’t know if this counts as a tree, but I think lilac bushes are beautiful.

Salad
List 3 foods you’d like to include in your dinner plans for tonight.

I’d like to include asparagus, feta stuffed chicken, and garlic mashed potatoes (yum), but guess what? I am working and will probably end up buying quiche or grilled cheese from The Bay Cafe.

Main Course
What is the best advice you’ve ever been given, but didn’t heed?

Always listen to your gut instinct. Had I done that, for example, I would’ve broken up with D ages before he broke up with me.

Dessert
On a scale of 1-10 (10 being highest), how much attention do you feel comfortable receiving from others?

I’d say about a 7. I don’t want to feel stalked (10), but I don’t want to be ignored either (0).

I promise a juicy, more interesting post… one day. If anything juicy and interesting happens to me.

Last night, after dance class, I was in bed, hungry, while reading Shakespeare.

I got up, cut myself up an apple and took it, along with some peanut butter, back to bed with me.

Let me tell you… nothing has ever tasted so delicious in my entire life. Well, at least no apple has.

I am now sitting at a computer at school working on an essay. And I’m hungry. An arm’s length away, laying in my bookbag, is an apple and some peanut butter. Unfortunately for me, however, I do not have a knife.

Nor can I go get one, for that would probably end up with me losing my coveted spot at a computer.

Woe is me.

Also, I forgot my lip balm in my English class.

Told ya nothing works out for me.

How’s that for overly dramatic?

I really hate where my computer is located in my house. It’s in the spare guestroom, nowhere near a window, and I feel like I’m in a dark, dank dungeon everytime I am on here. In an effort to spruce things up a bit, today I decorated my computer desk with a couple of candles, a small vase filled with tiny hot pink gerber daisies, a cute lamp that gives a soft glow, and a framed photo of Jenna and I from St. Patty’s Day 2004. I also put my huge poster of Van Gogh’s “Cafe At Night” on the wall behind the computer. Maybe now it won’t be so depressing to come in here.

Crap.

I just burned the bottom of a speaker with my candle.

Nothing ever works out for me, you know that?

Grumpy, grumpy.

I’m not feeling real inspired to write an entry, so I’ll just write a love/hate list about my weekend.

Loves: my St. Patrick’s Day outfit, green beer, free beer, friends, Creme Egg Mcflurry’s, late night pizza, spontaneous excursions, not spending a cent Saturday night, text messaging, taking goofy pics with Jenna, having family over, Chinese for supper, my clean room, new photos for my wall ripped out of an old day planner, lazy Sundays.

Hates: eight hour shifts at work, how cold its been at work, waiting in line, the weather, French homework, when guys don’t call when they say they will, creepy emails, the condition of my skin as of late, school, knowing I have to do my taxes, finding out one of my best friends is moving to Edmonton in less than 2 weeks.

And, why not? Things to look forward to: Latin hip hop tomorrow night, City and Colour with Wes Wednesday night, party at Roseanne’s Saturday night, hanging with Alyssa at school.

While I am glad my love list from the weekend is far longer than my hate list, it’s too bad I don’t have more to look forward to.

I’m sad about Roseanne moving to Edmonton, out of the six years we’ve been best friends we’ve only lived in the same place for two of them. At least I know our friendship won’t suffer, since we’ve remained friends while living hours apart! I am also a bit jealous. She gets to move to a new city, have a fresh start, and make killer money while I am still stuck in school (all spring and summer, did I mention that?), and living with my mother. I’m so cool.

I’m seriously exhausted, but this French homework won’t do itself.

Appetizer
What job would you definitely not want to have?

Yours. Seriously though, I shudder to think of spending the rest of my life working at my current job. Corporate bullshit is just so phony.

Soup
Oprah calls and wants you to appear on her show. What would that day’s show be about?

Probably debt control… I’m a slight shopaholic.

Salad
Name 3 vegetables that you eat on a regular basis.

Broccoli, cauliflower, carrots (all without dip!)

Main Course
If you were commissioned to rename your hometown, what would you call it?

Potato Stream… ask Megan!

Dessert
If you had a personal assistant, what kind of tasks would you have them to do?

Anything and everything under the sun, and I would sit and sip margaritas while demanding them to do so.

Happy St. Patrick’s Day everyone!