Daring to Be » 2007 » February

Last night I had a dream that I couldn’t make it to my first day of student teaching so I sent my big sister Nicole in my place.

The students loved her, their parents loved her, other teachers loved her, and she completely rocked as a teacher! Then I came back, and everyone hated me and I sucked terribly.

Yes, I suffer from LSIC (see title.)

Luckily it was just a dream, and student teaching was fine today. No, the students may not love me, but hey… it is grade five. I really don’t believe students in grade five like anybody.

I have nothing more to say on this subject because it is way too soon to say anything except wow, do I like kissing! So, sorry folks! Maybe more later.

So here’s some basic, less scandalous, news from my life…

I dug out a bunch of my old junior novels Friday night. Kass has an awesome suggestion of rereading Time for Andrew by Mary Downing Hahn. I loved that book! I re-read it as well as Wait Till Helen Comes, also by Mary Downing Hahn. Maybe it is time for some Big Kid books that take longer than a couple of hours to devour!

I went wedding dress shopping with Meg today. Let me tell you, Sean, your jaw is going to drop and stay there when you see her! Five more months!

Student teaching starts tomorrow for two solid weeks. I am in a grade five classroom with my friend Abby. We teach three lessons on our own and team teach three lessons, amongst about a gazillion other things we’re expected to do (observations, reflections, interviews, assignments from school, and so on and so forth.) It should be fun, fingers crossed that I don’t discover that teaching? Why would I want to do that? Because it would be lame to discover that the career path I’ve chosen is the wrong one. (That’s just paranoid Brea talking, stupid neuroses.)

All in all, I’m enjoying life lately. Not that I wasn’t before, but just more so now. Let’s hope my lucky streak lasts.

Recently I realized it had been ages since I kissed someone I actually liked. You know, had a crush on.

That changed yesterday.

Life? Is good.

“I’ve travelled the world twice over,
Met the famous: saints and sinners,
Poets and artists, kings and queens,
Old stars and hopeful beginners.
I’ve been where no-one’s been before,
Learned secrets from writers and cooks,
All with one library ticket
To the wonderful world of books.”
-Janice James.

As far back as I can remember, I have loved to read. Unfortunately, for the past few years I have been too busy with a little thing called Life to read as much as I would like to. I decided I had to do something about that.

My original plan for 2007 was to read five books a month. However, with the usual school, volunteer, and social demands that my life is full of I have realized that this is just not feasible. At least, not if I actually want to remember what I’ve read or absorb anything from the books! Naturally, my plan had to change a bit, so I changed it to merely increasing how much I read. Of course, I read a lot for school (textbooks, required readings, etc.) but let’s face it… that just isn’t as much fun!

So far this year I have read (in order from most recent):

1. 1. One Hundred Years of Solitude Gabriel Garcia Marquez
2. 2. A Friend of the Family: The True Story of David Snow Alison Shaw
3. 3. The Mermaid Chair Sue Monk Kidd
4. 4. The Time Traveler’s Wife Audrey Niffeneger
5. 5. Veronika Decides to Die Paulo Coelho
6. 6. The Lovely Bones Alice Sebold

Also, because I am going to school to become an elementary school teacher, it is important that I am familiar with children’s literature. To begin with, I’ve re-read a couple of junior novels I remember from my childhood.

1. 1. James and the Giant Peach Roald Dahl
2. 2. The Phantom Tollbooth Norton Juster

I really enjoy junior novels because not only are they easy reads, but they actually can be quite thought provoking. My classes at university have taught me how easy and effective it is to use books to teach everything from mathematics to social studies, so I can’t wait until I am a teacher and can try it out!

I’m asking you, dear readers, to send my way any suggestions as to good books (adult or junior, I’m not picky!) for me to read!

Never let me say an ill word against my big sister again.

Sure, we get on eachother’s nerves (like all sisters do), but I realized today she is the very first person I turn to in any sort of emotional crisis. Sometimes, the little sister in me can only be soothed by my big sister, and she does a great job of it.

Have I mentioned I have the most amazing family ever?

I was at this wedding Friday night, and no, I wasn’t dateless! I went with a very nice older man who also happens to be my father.

Anyway, my dad is a huge goof (hmm that explains a lot, no?) He is a retired school bus driver, and so knew a lot of the younger people at the wedding. And kept trying to pawn me off. Seriously. To these young boys he used to drive to school. I mean it was funny, haha, whatever. Nothing like your father announcing to everyone that yes, you are dateless.

(I’m not bitter.)

Moving on. The dance begins. Roseanne and I tore up the dance floor, dancing to all the old time dances and whatnot. Then one of the young ones Dad tried to pawn me off onto asked me to dance. A few times, actually. Trying to get real close, too. Finally, curiosity got the best of me.

Me: How old are you?
Young Grasshopper: Old enough.

Tell me that isn’t the funniest thing you have ever heard. Young Grasshopper is suave. I laughed, and said “No. Really.” He then proceeded to tell me he was drinking age, and was “almost twenty”. Not nineteen, nope. Almost twenty.

Silly boy.

I had a nightmare last night that I showed up to my Valentine’s Day blind date wearing my purple fleece pajamas with penguins on them, and there was absolutely nothing I could do but sit down and act like it was totally normal, everyone wears pajamas with penguins on them, in fact, why wasn’t he?

This morning my dream made me giggle. But let me tell you, in the middle of the night I was mortified.

Well, I have red hair and bangs now. As this photo suggests, I’m still debating whether or not I love it. It does make my eyes look even bluer, I’m down with that.

As if I don’t have the cutest dog in the world.

That’s it, that’s all I wanted to say.

One of the secrets on PostSecret really touched a chord with me. Papa used to always have lemon drop candies when my siblings and I were kids. When I was a teenager, it was Werther’s candy. Those two candies will forever remind me of Papa.I’m scared to eat them.

I am still mourning for Papa, which really shouldn’t come as a huge surprise, as it has only been a little over a month since he passed. But Papa’s death is the first death that has ever affected me this way. As much as I thought I was prepared for it, it still makes me incredibly sad when I think about it. I guess because he was a major part of my life.

Papa babysat me when Jaret and Nicole were off at school but I was too little. I used to take a nap with him on his green mat in front of the TV. We would look through a giant bird book he had, and I would help identify birds found in his yard. He was my date to go see Titanic when I was 15. He taught me how to dance. Papa would get this look in his eye when dancing with my sister or me, a look that said “Yes. Do you understand? Are you enjoying yourself?” Nicole and I saw that look for the last time when we went to Carrot River for the home’s Christmas supper. There was an old time band playing, and Papa was holding our hands and moving them to the music. And he gave us his “dancing look”.

Well, I’m officially crying. I just can’t believe how much I miss him, even though he hadn’t been the Papa I knew and loved my entire life for a long time. He didn’t even know who I was the last year or so of his life. Even so, he would kiss me goodbye and always told me he loved me, despite not knowing my name.

I miss the Papa of my childhood, I miss my childhood.

I want to eat lemon drop candies and Werther’s to remember, but I’m scared it will hurt to.